Brewers Hate-off
The Fuckshow Four
The Fuckshow Four
And then there were four. These players need no introduction. Their names alone conjure up images of biblical-sized iniquity.
Kevin Mench,champion of the Bando Division
vs.
Chad Moeller,champion of the Kinney Division.
Ben Hendrickson,champion of the Taylor Division,
vs.
Derrick Turnbow,champion of the Franklin Division.
Labels: Condom Head, Fellatio, Hendies, Poop, Sam the Eagle
posted by Condescendy @ 12:29 AM
36 comments
36 Comments:
I want Hendrickson versus Mench. Gimme some votes people.
I vote hendrickson versus moeller. It's a damn shame that two very deserving baseball players have to lose this round.
Moeller vs. Turnbow
MENCH v. Hendrickson
After last night's game though, I'm wishing the final four would have been MENCH, Bell, Gonzalez, and Kolb.
Kolb vs. Kolb. Oh yeah, I went there.
Moeller vs. Hendrickson (awesome picture btw)
Turnbow (kolb) vs. Mench (Kolb) is my real vote.
go to bed: 2 comments
wake up: 7 comments
I think the hate-off is having its desired effect.
I vote for Hendrickson and Moeller.
BCB, I think you can thank Kevin Mench and Turnbow for igniting the blog with their performances yesterday. People only partially hated the Brewers before last night's game. Any loss to the chubs makes me want to kill everyone on the team. That game pretty much sealed the deal. It will be Mench versus Turnbow. Did anyone see Mench's play in left field? Did they see the 0-4 with a strikeout, five men left on base and a double play? I'm just guessing here, but I bet he made those 5 outs seeing seven total pitches. Do I even need to ask about Turnbow? It's really too bad for Hendrickson, who was a clear favorite to win this thing when it started. Poor timing.
Also, let me issue a huge I told you so about Gayremi Gonzalez. Those that didn't hate him more than everyone other than Winkelsas should be ashamed.
BTW, should we think about doing a playoff prediction challenge like we did last year?
And who else is really pulling for the Reds to make the playoffs? Is there any chance the Brewers come through this weekend, fuck up the Cardinals, and somehow get the Reds, hopefully not the Astros, into the playoffs?
No.
Mench v Hendrickson
Too bad it had to come to this. There were some very deserving players sacrificed early that resurged last night. I've concluded that of these four talents, four different winners could come out on any given day.
sit down to poop: 8 comments
return from poop: 11 comments
grin.
I think a playoff prediction contest is definitely in order. I'll run that. you've got enough work ahead of you trying to sift through whatever you made all of us do at the beginning of the year. I'll also tackle the end-of-season awards.
I also wouldn't call hendrickson dead in the water just yet, he's up 6-2.
Moeller (Jenkins) vs. Hendrickson
I'd rather piss razor blades than watch either one of these players ever step on a baseball field ever again...Jenkins fits right in there as well, fucking money pit!
Nice pictures by the way... too bad you couldnt find a picture of a used tampon for Moeller
it's gotta be MENCH vs. ROIDSBOW. Clearly this vote was influenced by the game lastnight. What a waste of $3 million (or whatever turnbow's making) and what a waste of the Lee trade (besides getting Cordero, the best closer in history)... Our outfield and bullpen (especially our bullpen) are the two area we need to dramatically improve upon, and these 2 dicks are the first to go!
With Tommy, Erik, and my father yet to vote, here are the tallies:
Hendrickson 7 Turnbow 3 Kolb 1
Mench 5 Moeller 5 Kolb 1
Hendrickson has made the finals, and this mench moeller matchup is one for the ages!
there is absolutely zero chance i will pay attention to the rest of the reds games--let alone the chance they'll make the playoffs.
i think the big donkey is starting tonight's game in miami.
Mench and Moeller one for the ages indeed, but consider this:
Mench should win this round for one reason, he made us believe that he could do a reasonable job filling Lee's shoes offensively and that we were getting a defensive upgrade as well. While I know for a fact that I was on crack when I believed it, Melvin bought it too. And for making that god look retarded, Mench wins hands down. I mean, nobody thought Moeller would be good right.
BCB, you forgot the vote for Jenkins.
And just a side note, please stay true to your personal hatred for players. Many may be tempted, by some of the somewhat lewd, homoerotic, (but always-appropriate), hate promotion banter, to vote a different way than they would have if they didn't have to hear about De la Rosa and feces. I've had my top 3 contestants fall now, but the hate I've built up for them will burn on. Hate them for being lactose intolerant, for getting a nut removed when they were younger, for slumpbusting on a fat chick and then spitting in her face, for making more money than most of us can ever have wet dreams about, for experimenting with kiddy porn, or for just playing baseball like old people fuck. Just stay true to your own personal hate, and the true meaning behind the hate-off will live on for generations of Brewer fans.
Anybody else watching this display fielder is putting on????
He must have twenty five pieces of gum in his mouth. That man can EAT.
OH Radborn,
You couldn't have said it any better. I echo that sentiment completely.
This isn't about changing people's minds. If you hate a player, that's good. If you hate Joe Winkelsas more than any other player, then continue to do so. The purpose of the hate-off is to make you understand your own hatred and to give you a channel through which to express said hatred. This is like AA, except it's not anonymous and only about 80% of us are alcoholics.
I vote for Winkelsas and Mench.
Okay, that was me. I apologize for trying to cheat. I admit I've been trying to sway people's votes with pictures and such, too. I will stop.
Oh my god I think I just shit myself:
This is like AA, except it's not anonymous and only about 80% of us are alcoholics.
I vote for Cordero. That guy needs to go. Arod for cordero and prospect?
dude, no. Pictures are encouraged. We know each and every player in here is some form of shit, so please, more pictures.
Hendrickson v. Turnbow
Hahaha, E, did you do that on purpose? Did you intentionally have both players that were facing each other win?! I love that!
E, I think you're going to be the tying vote for Mench vs. Moeller, though. Unless our friend anonymous stops by again.
LIFM, the Reds were the only team in the NL which was in playoff contention and lost tonight. So much for that.
In that case, I vote Mench. What a pile. While Moeller sucked, at least the Brewers didn't act like he was a fucking rockstar when they got him. Also, the Hendrickson v. Turnbow was wishful thinking. Good lord what a bunch of shitbags this team has had over the course of the past year/decade.
two to go, mench up one.
Mench vs. Hendrickson
Hendrickson v. T.O.
Mench it is.
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